December 19, 2005
BoobaWooba Tries To Pickup A Hot Big Tit Karate Queen And Receives A Death Blow To The Testicles  I’m sorry to report that the uber intergalactic pornmonger BoobaWooba, renowned throughout the cosmos for the production and distribution of the most erotic, most sensual, most disgusting hardcore pornography known in the 76 explored parallel universes, has been readmitted to St Areolas Memorial Hospital suffering from blunt force trauma to the testes. It all began when BoobaWooba awoke from an extremely vivid erotic dream where he was eating direxian cherries from the boob cleavage of a group of oiled orion slave girls who had each not had sex for 6 years -- and who, therefore, were slightly excited at the prospect of engaging in sexual intercourse with our beloved smut-slinging alien superstar. After trying several times to get back into the dream and failing, BoobaWooba fled to his computer to look for some big tit jack-off material. Upon finding a free porn movie gallery of the sexy big tit hottie Miriam from Busty Adventures, BoobaWooba was instantly captivated by the beautiful karate expert. A flawless curvy athletic figure sporting a couple of the most perfect large breasts the diminutive green porn king had ever laid his alien eyes on. BoobaWooba decided that he needed to meet this busty hottie and apply his invincible charm, whereupon he was sure Miriam would melt and agree to become his newest Booba-Babe, as well as orally service his tiny wart covered alien penis.
Determined to recruit this hot big boobed martial artist for his intergalactic porn empire, BoobaWooba woke me, his loyal indentured webmaster and general manservant, in order to direct me to find as much information as possible on this hot piece of tits and ass. In short order, I was able to pinpoint Miriam’s place of residence to Prague, Czech Republic, Planet Earth, Sol System. BoobaWooba and I quickly boarded the hyperdrive enabled Booba-Cruiser and blasted off for Earth in a hurry. Once we arrived, I piloted the Booba-Cruiser into standard orbit and prepared BoobaWooba to be beamed down. Against my advice, the virile and sexually inexhaustible porn king insisted on going down alone, reassuring me that he had previously visited Earth many times as a sex tourist.  Once he arrived at Miriam’s karate dojo, BoobaWooba made a covert entrance to avoid attracting attention or an X-Files investigation. He spotted the lovely Miriam cooling off by a window after an apparently vigorous karate practice session. He saw his opportunity and made his move. He quietly approached the curvy goddess from behind and noticed that she wasn’t wearing a top. Miriam apparently likes to practice the martial arts topless! BoobaWooba watched as beads of sweat dripped off the sides of her glorious mams and simply couldn’t contain his arousal. With her back still to BoobaWooba, the master porn peddler involuntarily let out a roaring exclamation of raw sexual lust that sounded something like “Blaaaa-Kaaaa-Zoooo-Kooooo!!!” Startled, Miriam turned around to see the tiny green troll that is BoobaWooba rapidly jerking his erect microscopic penis and screamed at the top of her lungs. BoobaWooba, now certain that he had done something very, very, stupid and potentially life threatening, watched in paralized horror as Miriam adopted an aggressive karate posture and prepared the ultimate death move that would soon crush BoobaWooba’s tiny alien testes. With an elegant grace that seemed more artistic than menacing, Miriam delivered a quick and devastatingly executed karate kick to BoobaWooba’s groin that resulted in the tiny alien smut king being launched through the air at high speed which caused him to ballistically penetrate the front glass window of the dojo. When BoobaWooba landed in the mailbox across the street, he reports experiencing an indescribable pain of unimaginable intensity in his testicles, which were quickly inflaming to the size of Zarkezian grapefruits.
After rescuing BoobaWooba from the jaws of testicular destruction, I jacked up the hyperdrive on the Booba-Cruiser and high tailed it back to Nipplona, where BoobaWooba received medical attention for his gigantic inflamed gonads. This trip may have turned out to be a bit of a “bust,” but at least BoobaWooba did succeed in getting Miriam to touch his genitals. |
